Raise your hand if you think being friends with women is hard! I can just imagine all your hands raised on the other side of the screen!
Jesus was a great example of how important friendships were, but maybe you’re thinking Jesus was closest with men, so I should be friends with only men! I’ve lost count how many women have shared that it’s just easier to be friends with men because WOMEN ARE HARD. I admit I've been there before with girlfriends. It didn’t seem worth it. Men can be simpler (I mean that in the nicest of ways fellas). I am a mother of boys, and I was honestly really frightened that God might make me a mom of girls. Like a legitimate fear. I didn't know how to relate to girls, and I had years and years of baggage from girl warfare.
And boys are great. No male bashing here. We need to have Godly men in our lives for countless reasons. I LOVE that my husband is my best friend, but he can’t be my only friend. As a woman, having only male friends isn’t realistic or appropriate.
There is one simple fact that I have learned the past three years; Female friendships are not hard just because women are hard, but because they are under attack by our enemy.
In war, the biggest battles are planned for the biggest threats. If that is true, WE KNOW female friendships have to be a threat to Satan’s plans for our lives. I would like to propose that GODLY female friendships are being attacked with a similar ferocity that he he attacks marriages, because Satan knows that healthy female friendships grow the church, and he is scared of us.
Think of that, Satan is scared of us! Females are powerful in God’s church. Satan chose Eve not because she was the weaker sex, but because of the powerful influence she had over the heart of Adam. Satan thought he could subtly exploit that power and influence. Women can drastically affect the moods and directions of our homes through our actions and attitudes. Women are the heart of the family, and in turn the church.
Anybody have a mean girl in their school?
We think of Satan as a man, but he is going to come at us with mean girl tactics, not boy tactics. He knows how to divide women and make you feel less than enough. He specializes in creating cliches where woman feel either superior or left out. And Satan’s motivation is NOT the same as the mean girl you knew. That poor girl bullied because because she was afraid of being left out, or loosing her spot in the group. His motives are much more sinister..
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work; If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
He wants you fighting your battle alone so that WHEN, not IF, you stumble, you won’t have anyone to pull you back up. He wants you isolated.
A females’ life can change drastically for God when she is surrounded by other Godly women. Godly women can spur her on and encourage her in life's struggles. Through friendships, can see new intimacy in our marriages, find healing from old wounds, or seek genuine growth in our parenting.
On the other hand, Satan can also try to destroy a woman, a family, and eventually the church through the divisions between women. I saw first hand how Satan tried to tear my extended family apart through spiritual warfare in female relationships. The bitterness and divisiveness between the women of my extended family has had years of consequences that ripple though the lives of every male, female, and child.
Just because we’re women, doesn’t mean we are not on the front lines of a spiritual battle. Satan wouldn’t be attacking female friendships if we weren’t important to God’s plan.
ANYTHING WORTHWHILE IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR.
So…how do we fight? We must become aware of our enemies' tactics, see the landmines he plants as just that, an attack of an enemy trying to to divide you from those who would have your back in battle.
This is an excerpt from what I hope becomes an e-book I am writing. Let me know your thoughts, and if you'd be interested in reading more of the specific mean girl tactics Satan's uses to divide us.